How do you create the space for a new life amidst the constant activity bombardment of the old?
I am having a really hard time going into the office and investing my heart and soul into my work while knowing that in 33 days, I will submit my letter of resignation. It’s not because I don’t care about the university’s success or because I lack a commitment to my employees. It’s because no matter how difficult it is to deal with perceptions about my commitment level, my struggle is based on the healthy need to create mental space for something new. It is natural to be restless with the old when you are in transition. I’m sure many of you have felt what I’m writing about. Have you ever dreaded going to work? What is this feeling trying to say to us? “Make that Change.” (Yes, from Michael Jackson’s Man in the Mirror!)
Whether we believe it or not, there is a part of us that sees beyond our loss of a security image and fears of losing that stable income. This higher self is responsible for our lack of energy and dissatisfaction with work. It is calling us to follow a new path. A path that leads to joy, passion, curiosity and growth.
I have a co-worker who makes it a point to say every time someone has resigned, “he/she has already checked out.” For a while I dreaded the prospects of hearing those words about myself. I needed to be assured that everyone saw me as giving 150% every day. I now accept that there is a part of me that has to “check out” and allow others to take my place. Decisions will be made without my input, I don’t have to attend every key meeting or facilitate every networking event. 33 days is not a long time and the best way to deal with work is to start letting things go.
Last week I told my wife a story I had read in either the Holographic Universe by Michael Talbot or The Yoga of Time Travel by Fred Allan Wolf that illustrates the need to empty oneself to make room for something new. She thought I should blog about it that day. I told her I would, but it got bumped by some freaky spirit, energy ghost story. Then I went with a buddy of mine a few days later to see the movie 2012 and there again is the exact same story largely depicted on the silver screen- red robed monks and all! I got the message.
Empty Cup Mind
“A wise old monk once lived in an ancient temple. One day the monk heard an impatient pounding on the temple door. He opened it and greeted a young student, who said, “I have studied with great and wise masters. I consider myself quite accomplished in Buddhist philosophy. However, just in case there is anything more I need to know, I have come to see if you can add to my knowledge.” “Very well,” said the wise old master. “Come and have tea with me, and we will discuss your studies.” The two seated themselves opposite each other, and the old monk prepared tea. When it was ready, the old monk began to pour the tea carefully into the visitor’s cup. When the cup was full, the old man continued pouring until the tea spilled over the side of the cup and onto the young man’s lap. The startled visitor jumped back and indignantly shouted, “Some wise master you are! You are a fool who does not even know when a cup is full!” The old man calmly replied, “Just like this cup, your mind is so full of ideas that there is no room for any more. Come to me with an empty-cup mind, and then you will learn something.”
I have learned that quitting the university and becoming an author is not the real risk. The real risk is revealing all of me to you. It is a crash course in ego management.
My mind gets caught up with ego-based thoughts: “It is so cool that people think I’m so deep”, “What does he mean by this blog is a good marketing strategy?”,” Why doesn’t she write less about what it means to her and more about me?”, “Do they think this is too weird?”, “He said it was interesting, but he didn’t say it was VERY interesting.”
Why am I taking this risk and exposing all of me?
Because I have to empty my mind if I am to learn something new.
No comments:
Post a Comment